What Fool Am I--- To Brave Today

Oh Miss Faye,

I trust you enjoyed your holiday as much as I did mine. And I'm sure that Santa was as good to you as he was to me. I do think the best gift of all, as I told my brother last night on the phone, was the rain. I know it didn't rain hard, but what fell had to sink in. What a glorious site to hear the pitter patter of rain drops after the pitter patter of reindeer hooves. Hmm, maybe the rain was to clean up the messes left by the team?

Oh, the agony of it all. I had to put on all my armour and head out to the Fayette Pavilion in order to exchange two gifts of the wrong size variety. Memories of Christmas past had me in a sweat as I mentally prepared myself for the LONG lines. I fretted. I panicked. And then, away I went before good sense could kick back in and keep me warm in my pjs playing with my Christmas toys.

What's this? Where are the masses? Why are there parking spots close to the front of the stores? Has everyone come and gone already or are they just waiting for me to show up?

The first store was a breeze. There were five clerks for checkout today, compared to the two last week. I stood in line for about 3 minutes and painlessly made my exchange. Hey, this was ok. Let's head on to the big box at the far end of the Pavilion. Ok. So there weren't so many empty spots. Maybe that should have been my first clue.

So, the line at the main checkout is long. Hmm. The second clue. Nah. They are all buying the after Christmas markdowns. I'm just going to swoop in, find the right size in slippers, exchange them with a smile, and be off to that electronics store to do some serious shopping.

Third clue. They have empty racks where the slippers were just last week. Oh, there they are. Scattered here and there. Ah, there's the style. Grab........ aggghhhh. They don't have the right size. Now my feet are regular sized, no special needs. Why can't I find my size? I'm starting to pant. I search through the small discarded slippers on the bottom rack, and viola! They have one pair in the store in my size. Alright!

Feeling back on track, I head off to the back of the store for an exchange. I search for the end of the line. Oh dear. Now, I'm getting eye glazing from all those who are standing in this line waiting to see one of three clerks who can assist. Five minutes go past. Then ten. Now I'm starting to panic. If I didn't mind cold feet, I would just leave. But I can't as I wore out last year's slippers two weeks ago and my tootsies are turning blue.

Follow the line. I must follow the line. Here I am at the start, and only a mere twenty minutes of waiting-- all to exchange one pair of slippers! I've lost my smile by this point and just want to escape. The lady working behind the exchange desk doesn't seem so merry, either. Maybe she's been waiting the crowds to leave. At least I get to leave when I shove my slippers her way, along with the receipt.

I fight my way back out of the store, too tired to do anything else. So, I skipped the electronics store and came home. Home to my little house and my nice new slippers that fit. I think I'll wear them for a couple of days straight. And with any luck at all, it will rain a few more times before the end of the year.