Saturday, March 28, 2009

Gray Thoughts on a Rainy Day

I just can't believe it! Our sooooooo friendly-let's-stretch-out-a-hand-to-our-enemies leaders are thinking about letting the terrorists go free and then relocate them to our lands? This is because their own countries don't want them back? And then, our so-very-neighborly-so-very-friendly-new-residents will have to be supported by, um, us? Why, so they can plot their next moves?

Give me a break. Those detainees down there have no remorse, yet they may be free to live among us? My hair is all curled up in disbelief about this, and today, I can't blame it on the rain.

Is it ever gonna stop raining? The local creeks and now a river are either out of their banks or gonna be? Hey, is this nature's way of showing discontent over the decisions being made up north?

Don't take my word for it. Go to a great new site I found during all this rain-forced-me-inside-off-the-porch time, Living in Bizarro World, and read some comments and the story itself. Then, you too, will positively run to the store and get your julep juice makings. Could be we're in for some rough weather- not only from nature, but from the oh-so-friendly-we-love-everyone-but-our-own folks in Washington.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Happy Days are (Apparently) Here Again in Georgia

Well, girlfriends, I guess y'all are as tickled as I am to know that
things in Georgia are in such fine shape as to allow legislators to
focus on a resolution commending Mr. Obama for the fine job he's done
in his first 60 days. Forget unemployment. Forget financial deficits.
Forget foreclosures and job layoffs and plant closings and crime rates
and that we're entering the season when teenagers maim and kill while
driving too fast and/or under the influence. No need to bother about
trivial things like that when we've got a President who's been in
office for almost 2 months and still hasn't been properly invited to
be an honorary member of our little ole' state legislature's black
caucus. Where are our manners?

And there's apparently not enough to occupy our legislators because
when they didn't get their way, some of them just up and left. Walked
right on out the door, grumbling under their breath and stomping their
proverbial feet. Seems to me, we elected people to spend the first
three months of the year in Atlanta crafting and studying and passing
or rejecting bills that continue the principles we Georgians hold dear
and pledge allegiance to: wisdom, justice, and moderation.

Oh, fiddle-de-de. I think I'll quite worrying my pretty little head
about it and go fix me a julep. I mean, really: if the people we
elected aren't concerned with anything more than brownnosing the
President (perhaps in hopes of getting an invite to his next party),
why should I be?

Till next time,
Miz Vul

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Gonna buy me a gun. Or two.

I just finished watching a YouTube video of a CNN piece in February. They said that in November gun purchases went up 42% over the previous year. They also said that there is a shortage of ammunition and across the country gun shops have up to 11 month back orders on guns.

If you happen to own stock in any gun company you own one of the few that're actually making money.

I had to have some work done on our home alarm system the other day. The owner of the company was in the area so he came by to replace the defective piece himself. Just making conversation as I have always been taught to be polite and engaging, I asked "how's business?".

He said he couldn't keep up with demand, that is was better than it had ever been.

I was surprised for less than a split second. It makes sense. Everyone knows that the harder times get the higher crime goes.

Now the reason people are buying up all those guns right now isn't just because they think times are getting ready to get real dangerous, they're also scared of what our new President's administration is going to do about our guns.

See, when President Obama was a senator, he signed onto a bill that would have increased taxes on guns 500%. Others in his administration, namely Eric Holder, have spoken out against guns in ways that have a lot of people concerned about the future of gun ownership.

There's talk of numbering bullets. That's not really a bad idea if someone commits a crime with a gun and you want to figure out where the bullet came from you may think... but that would only work if you had to register every time you bought ammunition I'd think. I'd think the bad guys would just steal bullets. Can you imagine what the costs would be to put numbers on each and every little bullet? Whoa Nellie!

Another thing "they" talk about is putting some device in guns when they're manufactured that allows guns to be traced. Now I'm not sure if they're talking about a little chip or just what they're talking about, but again I think the cost would be astronomical. And anyone who thinks that the bad guys won't just be figuring out how to get rid of those devices real quick like is balmier than my Aunt Gladys.

I hear tell that Eric Holder doesn't like gun shows either. Which seems kind of silly to me as you still have to register the gun if you buy it at a gun show.

I don't happen to own any guns but I sure would like to for the first time in my life.

Oh, oh, I almost forgot to tell you! Because I write a blog and because I want a gun and because I consider myself to be a Patriot and because I have bumper stickers on my car, I could be on the government's watch list!

Yes, little old me could be considered a potential "domestic terrorist" or a militia member.

I'm so excited.

Another "tell" is that old "Don't Tread On Me" flag. You know, the one with the snake coiled up with the thirteen spots to signify the thirteen colonies that were in existence when it was thought up? I have decided to go out and buy a flag to put on my lawn so they'll know where to find me.

Well, I may joke about this, but in reality I find it rather scary that simply being patriotic and caring enough to write a blog could bring me to the eye of Big Brother.

All that I just talked about is in the government's "The Modern Militia Movement" info. I gather it was put out by the Missouri folks, so I'm not real sure if it's part of a national thing or just something they developed. I heard Glenn Beck talking about it and read an article or two about it, but none of them were real clear about who, what, when or where.

I guess I really don't rank yet though because wanting to buy a gun and actually owning a gun are very different.

Here are a few other things included in that 'signs you may be a member of the militia" booklet:

- writing about the Constitution (check)
- supporting third party candidates like Ron Paul or Bob Barr (not yet, but it our Republican politicians don't get their act together I might be willing to lean third-party_
- attending one of those tax protest tea parties (check)
- writing about taxes (check), North American Union (check), or illegal immigration (check)
- being a conservative Christian (check)

It is really scary when you think about it!

There are so many scary things going on in our country right now. Everything that is good seems to be under attack and I just feel so helpless to do anything about it. I am trying though which is why you all don't hear from me much and why I find so little time to sit on the porch these days.

Which reminds me of another good stock to own: alcohol companies. I have decided that right after I buy my guns, I'm going to start stockpiling every kind of booze I can find. If it gets really bad people the currency of alcohol will probably be better than that of gold don't you think?

Hope to talk soon ladies, I surely do miss you!

Miss Faye

Friday, March 20, 2009

Toastmasters (could come) to the Rescue

Hey Y'all,

I've had to take a break from listening to those fools in Washington.
The doctors have warned me to stay away on account of the way it
raises my blood pressure, even though the pharmaceutical companies
would undoubtedly be glad to have me as a regular user. Anyway, today
I couldn't stand it any longer, so I turned the radio on for just a
minute this morning, and I have to ask: have y'all heard that Robert
Gibbs speak? The White House Press Secretary can't seem to start a
sentence with anything but silence or a string of "ah's" and "um's".
It's nervewracking to listen to him. Makes him sound like a damn liar.
I am thinking of sending him a little message suggesting he join a
Toastmasters group that meets near him. They've got somebody at every
meeting who counts the "ah's" and "um's" and other fillers, and by
golly, they announce it at the end of the meeting. Then today he goes
and makes a wiseass comment about does anybody have a dollar so so-and-
so can go buy a paper to read the answer to his question. I, for one,
did not find that especially funny.

And don't even get me started about when the British Prime Minister
came to town and Obama was TOO TIRED to do it up right. The Obamas can
throw a party and serve $100/lb steaks and hire Earth, Wind, and Fire
to entertain and the Marine Band to play during breaks. They can have
game systems set up for all the children (you think those kids are
coached ahead of time to let the Obama girls win?) and adults alike,
but they can't follow protocol when the British Prime Minster comes to
call? Does that make sense to anybody?

Oh, and it gets better. This one just slays me: The President is
stressed. He's tired and stressed and surprised at how hard the job
is. Has the man ever looked at pictures of preceding presidents on
Inauguration Day and exit day? As Super Chicken always said to his
cohort when the whining and complaining set in, "You knew this job was
dangerous when you took it, Fred."

I've got to go have me a dose of blood pressure medicine and wash it
down with a mint julep or three. Then tomorrow I'm thinking about
going to get me one of those clicker thingies and start counting the
fillers that come out of that Press Secretary's mouth.

If I can stand to listen to the fool long enough. I've got my blood
pressure to watch, you know. I have never seen such a fiasco as we
have going on in Washington right now. They ought to be ashamed.

Talk to you later.

Miz Vul

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Is Barbie's Age the Issue?

Oh, come on. Can't you see why that silly government-yeah-I-only-do-what-I-was-sent-here-for maniac would want Barbie's head on the old chopping block?

She's gotten older, and well, let's face it. Her health may not be what it used to be and well, she may need to start using doctors for some things (unless she's been doing that somewhere else so her fans wouldn't know), and before you know it, she'll have used up all her health care benefits and Medicare may have to step in. With the proposed health care reform which would ration health care, well, Barbie would be on the short end of the stick with the rest of us who have passed the 50 year mark.

Fight Barbie, fight. Fight for your right to live free in America!

Miss Etta

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Barbie Turns 50 and Now Faces Being Killed by Lawmakers

Be still my heart! Some crazy coot in West Virginia (and yes, that is still a state in the United States) has submitted legislation to ban Barbie! Apparently, the coot who must not have ever, never played with GI Joe, thinks Barbie's beauty is just too much. He thinks her beauty takes away from her intelligence.

Give me a break. First, every, and I mean every, red blooded American girl and many across the world have played Barbie for 50 years! And, if you really look into her eyes and at her eye makeup from the earlier days, well, that didn't stop me from getting a college education. Nope. It didn't stop any of my friends from becoming business owners and Presidents of corporations. Shoot. In my day, Barbie used to take out Ken and GI Joe in one fatal blow.

Give me a break. You gals want to weigh in on this crazy scheme? I think it's just part of the overall conspiracy to end life as we know it. No Barbie? What is this world? Crazy? Hmm, think I'll pull out my Barbie boat and serve up some of my delicious glasses of julep juice. She's gonna need it when I tell her.

A Little Ownership Goes a Long, Long Way

'Morning friends,

Last night hubbie and I popped in a movie to complement our bedtime
juleps, and he chose "The Untouchables". I have to tell you girls, it
was quite discombobulating watching Eliott Ness bring down Al Capone
on charges of tax evasion. "Shoot," I said to the mister, "Capone was
just ahead of his time. Had he been living now, he would've just
written a check and gone on to assume a high level office in the
federal government."

My inquiring mind is on the loose again, and I'm wondering how so many
of Mr. Obama's "trusted allies" can whip out the checkbook and dash
off a check for tens of thousands of dollars. If they had the money in
their checking account all along, why didn't they just pay the damn
taxes when they were due?

This morning I read where Mr. Obama's team is going after Switzerland
for their long-standing policy of privacy. Gonna' make the Swiss
disclose names of Americans who have money in their banks. It's not
enough that the U.S. government keeps tabs on our deposits and
withdrawals here in our own country, now they are going global.

Now I realize that the Bank Secrecy Act of 1970 was enacted to expose
and deter money-laundering, and I realize that lots of lawbreakers
park their money in offshore banks and I'm all for punishing those who
commit illegal activity, but it does not escape my imagination that
the government (wouldn't be surprised if they soon require me to
capitalize that word) is trying to keep as much of our money as
possible in the United States. And it scares me to death to think
about the possible consequences of that - not for the lawbreakers, but
for law-abiding people who live beneath their means and happen to have
nest eggs they'd like to keep for and spend on themselves.

According to one news report on, there's about $2.2 trillion
in Swiss banks, and though that's not nearly enough, I'm sure the
government realizes that it's an amount that would sure go a long way
towards keeping AIG afloat for another month or so or produce a few
automobiles or help build a super-road between Los Angeles and Las
Vegas or help a single mother raise 8 babies.

This guy Carl Levin from Michigan is leading the charge, calling for a
ban on so-called tax avoidance plans, and he has asked - of all people
- Timothy Geithner to talk to folks at the Group of 20 meeting in
April and get them on board. Tim Geithner, the new Treasury Secretary
who had to whip out his checkbook and pay back taxes (no penalties or
interest like the rest of us would've had to pay, mind you) on his way
into the confirmation hearings.

I declare, I might eventually be able to convince myself that
Geithner's experience with tax avoidance gives him credibility - but
only if the juleps don't run out.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

So, so frustrated with all the nincompoops

Well, first of all, hi ya'll. It has been a long time since I stopped in to chew the fat. I know, I know, that is not a proper phrase for a perpetually dieting kind of gal to use, but you all know me: if it pops into the ol' brain it's going out the mouth or onto the screen.

Now, down to business because I know you are wondering what nincompoops I'm referrin' to in that title. Some of you are wondering, but I believe my minty sisters will know exactly to whom I am referencing. Was that proper English? Oh well, just call it Missfayenglish and move on if it's not.

Nincompoops. Dummies. Stoooopid. Those idiots in Washington D.C. who are busily tearing down everything that is good about our America. Are they all drinking some special brand of kool-aid? Does our new President have some sort of hypnotic powers or is the media brainwashing every last one of them boys and girls up there?

Even miss-I-can't-balance-a-check-book-to-save-my-life knows you can't just keep reaching into the till to grab money, or in their case print money. There are just so many heads of lettuce that will grow in a patch before they become puny and worthless. You have to fertilize the soil and take some care with the basics.

These dummies are telling us we can have all the lettuce we want and they are forgetting you have to water the darned stuff and fertilize it and weed it and you know all the stuff you have to do to make things grow.

They are ignoring all our small businesses. They are fixing to tax us to shreds. Ya'll don't think that if they tax those people at the top that they're just going to sit back and take it do you? Don't you think that they'll just up their prices or fire a few folks or not build some new factory they were going to build? What's next? Is the government going to force people to stay in their jobs? Will they stop them from raising their prices?

We are getting ready to be just like Venezooayla or Cuba.

All you people with your hands out better take those hands and start using them to earn some money. You want me to pay your way you have another thing coming cause I'll just stop working and stick my hands out right along side yours. Then who's going to pay for your food?

You remember that book by Ayn Rand where all the people who work hard and are self sufficient just pick up themselves and go away? You don't think it can happen in this country? Take a look at history and you'll see that every time government gets too big for its britches and starts expecting people with brains and self respect to pay for those who like coasting along on coat tails, those smart people move somewhere else. Or they just quit.

I am so angry I could just spit nails except I know that pretty soon there won't be anyone who can make good nails and if I spit 'em out they'll tax 'em.

Wake up America before you lose what you keep saying you love about this country. Get off that couch, turn off the stupid television and do something to take care of your kids future.

Whew, that felt good. I have been wanting to have a rant rage for so, so long. If you think I'd done though, you are very wrong. I'm just getting started. Next time they have one of those tea parties, I'm going to be the one throwing big juicy wet teabags.

Miss Faye

Inquiring Mind on the Loose

My mama always warned me about people who talk out of both sides of
their mouth, and now we appear to have one living in the White House.
Did y'all hear him today, girls? In the midst of all his
bafoodletrigagillionmilzzilion stimulus/bailout/let's-save-America-by-
throwing-money-at-it plan - on the heel (it was just yesterday so I
don't consider that long enough to be plural heels) of AIG holding out
their tin cup again, shaking it in the direction of Washington, Mr.
Obama says that he doesn't pay any attention to Wall Street daily
gyrations, the implication being that business and government are
separate entities.

I'm so confused.

For months now, he's been jawing about how much money he's gonna'
throw at this big business and that big business, how much money he's
gonna' pass out to create jobs (none of it "pork", of course) and yet
he wants us to believe that he pays no attention to what Wall Street
does because that's business and he does government?

Government that already enjoys partial ownership in banks (which makes
me wonder if we, the taxpayers, are gonna' get dividend checks - what
do you think?). Government that will soon own equity in AIG.
Government that will soon be designing and rolling cars off the
assembly line.

The line's become blurred - more blurred than ever before - and I'm
wearing my new glasses, so it's not me.

And while I'm on a roll, I've got one more thing I want to get off my
chest (yes, Misses Etta and Faye, you're right: I have a lot more
things, but I'm running kinda' tight on time, so I'm only going for 2

The Democrats habitually employ class envy to gain votes. A page right
out of the ole divide-and-conquer playbook. Mr. Obama rides into
Washington wanting to/promising to level the playing field by taking
from those who have and giving to those who need (or in many cases
want), a page right out of the socialist playbook. Then what does he
do just as soon as he lands and gets his bags unpacked and his
pictures hung? He starts throwing parties like nobody's business.
Serving steaks as big as Texas and as expensive as California business
taxes. Hiring bands to stand right in front of the television and
entertain. Puttin' on the ritz, my mama called it, and I just want to
know why he couldn't take that money and dole it out to folks in need.
(Or want.)

This inquiring mind just wants to know.

And now back to my julep, already in progress . . .

Miz Vul

Monday, March 2, 2009

Honestly Naive?

What a fun day we had in our little area of heaven yesterday. Didcha see all those big snowflakes? Didcha go out and play in the snow?

It's way too cold for me to risk getting frostbite on my delicate little fingers and toes whilst I wait for my gossip group to show up on the front porch this morning. So, I've been watching some mindless television.

One of the topics I keep seeing is on the Octo-mom. You know, the young woman in California who had eight babies recently? Her attitude about having the babies kinda reminds me of the general spending views up in Washington right now.

This young woman keeps saying, "I get it." Guess she doesn't understand what is involved in adding eight children to her already big brood. Her reality doesn't appear to exist.

Just like the government. Sure, they get it. They know money is tight. They know times are tough. Their solution is just like the octo-mom's.

Just go on and spend taxpayer money to take care of all of our problems.

Goodness me. I've gotta go sip on my hard earned, non government provided, non taxpayer supported julep juice. At least I can honestly see and am not naive about what the future holds for all of us if Big Brother is the only way out.


Mint Julep Journal