Chicken Squawk on a Piggy Day

I was out yesterday doing my chicken thing. You know, the kind of mindless talk you have with some friends while you all just stand around and scratch the ground like a big group of chickens? The kind of talk where you can solve all the problems of the world? The kind of talk that just lets you vent your opinion? The kind of talk where you can just squawk and squawk? Yep, it was one of those days.

So many topics to consider this morning. The swine flu, which in truth is a type of human flu, has people so scared that now some folk are afraid to eat pork. I don't see that as a problem, as long as the pork is cooked. And then, there are the folks that say the Big Cheese in DC was conveniently in Mexico right before the breakout. Guess those folks in DC will be using this flu outbreak as their reason to protect us all from our own healthcare and mandate it.

And, then of course, there are the companies who are going in to panic mode. Can you believe it? I just heard of a local employer that will no allow handshakes or hugs. Course, I gotta wonder who has been doing the hugging anyway. Just thinking of having to hug some of the people I've worked with over the years is enough to give me body aches and chills.

And to top it off, there is now a group willing to pay the President something like $25 million for his original birth certificate. Why pay it to him? Why make him rich when all he craves is power? Why not offer it to someone, anyone, who can produce it? Why, there might be a long line from a certain town in an undisclosed location. Bet that money could go a long way for the shrine they are building.

Well, enough of my chicken talk. Enough of my squawking. Now, it's time to make some more julep syrup. Got a big day coming up soon and I've yet to study the horses.

Miss Etta

Just Give Me One for the Road

I'm in love! From now on, I'll just need one of my julep juice drinks a day. I know you gals are probably wondering how can that be?

Well, my friends, let me share the good news with you. The world's largest mint julep cup, which incidentally holds something like 206 gallons of my favorite beverage, will be on display this year up at the big fancy dancy horse race in Kentucky.

Just imagine. Just one glass full and I'm set for the day. 'Course, I gotta wonder if how big the mint spring is on top of the glass. Think it's large enough for me to put a pool lounger in the top of the glass so I can just lean over to take my dainty sips? Heck, wonder if it's big enough for us all just to dive in and swim to our hearts are content?

From now on, I'll just have to decline a second julep juice and just say, "I'll take one for the road, please."

Miss Etta

I Don't Drink Tea, but I Loved the Parties

You know, I made the rounds of the Tea Parties the other day, and I
went as myself, even though I gave careful consideration to wearing a
mask on account of that report stating that the federal government
would be watching very closely and investigating us dissenters. Then I
decided, shoot, my finger prints are already in the system from when I
applied for my gun permit not so long ago, and now that i bank at a
nationalized financial institution, they have access to all my
financial information (not that they didn't already), so off I went in
my very own face. And yes, I smiled the whole time just in case they
were taking my picture.

I'm gonna' tell you what, when me and my 15,000 new best friends sang
the national anthem, why it just gave me goosebumps. (But, no, chills
did not run up and down my leg like they did on that fella who was
following Obama during the campaign said they did him whenever he
heard Obama speak.) (Don't that just beat all?)

But what really warmed my cockles was all those handmade signs bearing
multi-syllable words and expressing complex thoughts. Didn't see the
first one that just said "change" or "hope" or "change you can believe
in." Not the first one.

So all in all, it did my heart good. Let's just hope the momentum is
just beginning.

Till next time,
Miz Vul

My Cup Runneth Over

Three cheers for all the Tax Day Tea Parties. It seems like there was one on almost every street corner in America. Some estimates I've seen today say over 750,000 Americans participated in them. So, I guess that can be considered a movement. So, when will the news media cover them? Oh, that's right. They won't. Yeah, I heard of all the off color jokes told about the tea parties. Guess ya gotta make fun of what you're afraid of, eh?

From what I saw up close and personal and on the only news station brave enough to cover it, the protest against excessive government spending was quite dignified. From what I heard from the partygoers is the overwhelming sense of wanting to save our country. Wonder if anyone is listening?

You gals seen the latest and greatest silver cup unveiled for the tight lipped and proper sipping of our very own favorite mason jar julep juice yet? Why, I almost lost my teeth on the price of it. It's a thousand smackers. Can you believe it? Ok, so it's sterling silver and all. Hey, the good thing is the proceeds do go to help the permanently disabled jockeys.

Wonder if there's a silver plated mason jar that will go to help us gals when we become disabled due to all the heavy lifting of our jars? Maybe we'll end up qualifying for a bailout.

Cheerio,
Miss Etta

Wincing with Every Bite

Tis tax day, my front porch friends. I've completed the awful chore of getting them ready and have even filed them. Gotta tell ya, it was like biting down on a lemon. It was sour and certainly not a pleasant experience.

I'll be interested to hear about all those Tax Day Tea Parties today. You think anyone will care to join us for a mason jar full of our very own delightful julep juice? Look for me. I'll be waving a tea bag and a mason jar at the same time.

Ms. Georgie

Well, Did You Ever

Well, girlfriends, when that ship captain being held hostage by
pirates in a life raft bailed out and started to swim like crazy
towards shore, he forgot one thing: Hillary and Obama are in charge.
Being one who lives and dies by the polls, Hillary didn't want to rush
into anything when word of the pirate takeover first got to her. No,
she had to start a focus group and get a "consensus from the
international community".

Can you BELIEVE that? Even if such a thing was POSSIBLE, who CARES
what the rest of the world thinks? It's not THEIR person sitting there
in the middle of the ocean with hoodlums.

But that was a few days (read listening groups) ago. Now she's got to
scratch all those and form a new one to decide whether or not we will
pay the pirates their requested ransom.

What do y'all bet that we not only pay them, we'll create a stimulus
package for them because OBVIOUSLY if they had sufficient means they
wouldn't resort to pirating. Bless their hearts. No, no, no: sit back
and let the U.S. government do the pirating for you. We'll probably
bring 'em on into this country and set them up in housing, send them
and their families to school, and provide free healthcare for the lot
of them. And so they won't have to go back to the dirty, dangerous,
tiring world of pirating, why don't we just put them to work building
some of those roads?

No, wait: these people have all the skill sets needed to make fine
financial market CEO's. And I hear Obama and Franks (the CEO's of all
CEO's) are hiring.

Oh, shoot. I need a julep now worse than ever.

Miz Vul

With Thoughts of Commemorating

Miss Etta,

Though I'm quite familiar with what some folks call The Kentucky Derby
(I call it Julep Celebration Day), I had not heard about that Celeste
Susany painting a picture. Huh.

Listen, I saw some silver mint julep cups over at Scott's last month.
I spect they were the real thing cause they were for sale for $169
each. When I saw the price tag, I put all 3 of them back on the shelf
VERY CAREFULLY. Shoot, I figure juleps taste just as good out of a
sweating mason jar as they would out of a sweating silver cup that has
to be polished every now and then.

You thinking we oughta see about commissioning somebody to at least
take our picture? We could call it Drinking Towards Destiny.

Just a thought.

Miz Vul

Seen Our Very Own Julep Bottle?

Whoopppeeee. Have you heard the news? We've become so very famous with our minty julep juice that a famous equine artist is going to depict us on a bottle!

No, wait. It's not exactly us, my swilling friends who love the minty fresh taste. It's, well, it's for the place where we got our little ole selves hooked.

What? Doncha remember when we all went up to see that big horse race in Kentucky? We wore such cute hats and had those wonderful Mint Juleps!

This year, in celebration of 22 years of the Mint Julep being the official drink at the Kentucky Derby, Celeste Susany has been commissioned for an an original oil painting of Churchill Downs. I've read the painting this year is called "Dueling Towards Destiny" and shows two horses racing towards the finish line with the cheering crowds and the Twin Spires in the background.

Did you know over 2 million of our fancy drinks have been served up there? I wonder how that compares with how many we serve ourselves? How do I love Julep Juice? Let me count the ways.

Miss Etta

So Much for Taste

There I was, just taking my mornin' constitutional walk and singin' one of my songs when I saw it. A huge tree just decided it couldn't take all the love shown to us from nature this last week, so down it went- Right into the roof of the new addition on the house. The addition was so new that the siding hadn't even been painted yet. Whew, I thought. How lucky for the homeowner.

I imagine the homeowner was counting the blessings when position of the tree was noted. After all, if the new addition hadn't been there, well, let's just say the owner probably would have woken up with a booming headache. Yep, that ole big tree would have gone smack dab down in the bedroom area.

Sometimes, my friends, I just have to wonder. Do we really note the times we are just saved by the skin of our teeth, or just think we're darn lucky?

Ah, now speaking of lucky, did you just happpen to see that Barbie has gone and gotten her own white hat with flowers for the running of the roses? Now, you know that I'm quite partial to the old gal. I just find one thing wrong with her derby outfit.

Yep, that's it. She has no mint julep!! Doesn't she know that the tradition of my favorite greenish drink is on the line here? Why, we must fix that at once!

And here I was, thinking that she had shown such taste over the years. Well, after she lost the extreme blue eyeshadow and all.

Cheerio,

Miss Etta